Nice Noodles, Nasty Nicole and Naughty Nige!

Nige of the awesome quotes has decided that he should start a blog too, and I recommend it. Do note, it does contain swearing and all other manner of vulgarity. A Lincoln Stoner's Life. Nige always has... unique perspective on life. Oh. I'm going to MASH him. He's stolen my quote-idea! Excuse me a moment, I'm off to go grumble in a corner.

Right, sorry about that.

I hear today someone I seriously don't like (and has done bad things to my friends) sent me an apology.

My response was somewhat classical of my style: "Nicole can go stuff herself up a stuffing palmtree with a stuffed bright pink pigeon and a citrus fruit!"

Toned down for my younger viewers. Yes, I'm looking at you guys. And those with the younger mental ages - fill it in for yourself. And the person the grater-roll belongs to, let me know and I'll reference you. I just thought it was great.

When we went out for dinner, I got asked "Are you a vegetarian?" I'd gone for the tofu dish you see. To answer your question; no, not by choice - I just had the *coughs* fortune to be sat between two vegetarians. But I have to admit, yasai itame is pretty good! That's stir fried bok choi, onions, peppers, mushrooms, tofu and beansprouts with massively chunky rice noodles in a chili and coconut something. It's kind of like a soup. That you eat with chopsticks. Makes hell of a mess, I can tell you, woo slippery noodles, great fun! I gotta tell you though, fudge cake with a dark chocolate wasabi sauce, that's very different.

I took my dragon out with me last night, my housemates thought it would be a great idea - so we took him with us to the pub. Dragon was perfectly happy to settle down and sleep for both of the three mile walks, and was happy to run around on the clean pub table. He's made several new friends, including the barman himself. Apparently beer flavoured fingers are pretty tasty. I wouldn't know - he licked them, not me. But then again, the dragon licks socks.

Today's Quote: "About bl**dy time, miss your ramblings!" - Remaining Anon for safety reasons.

Snake Things and Butter Dishes

Wow, sorry sorry sorry, time sort of got away with me from one thing to another! Nothing's been happening, but you know how it is.

Ohhhhkay, just had the most random call. Someone went Hello? I'm like, yeah, hello? they went "Who's this? So I told them. And this then happened a few more times. The penny dropped, and I now know who it is.
Did you get me any sweets?"
I responded "Yes, I got you Smarties."
This went on for a bit longer, until "Merry Christmas!"
"Well, what can you say?! "And a happy new year to you too..." was the best I could come up with. Oh, and "Enjoy your Wednesday." Even though it wasn't.
The caller's obsessed about the "snake thing" - my bearded dragon. "Sssssssssssssnaaaake thing." That's apparently my new nickname.
Kinda funky - Ssssssnake thing.

Ugh, it's been THAT sort of day, following another one. First one, I was washing up the massive stack left by the housemates, when it slowly occurred to me that it hadn't been piled up in the most stable of manners... Well, as I was halfway through doing the other bits from around the kitchen, I decided it could wait just a second - which proved to be my downfall. The mixer jug slid off a wonky tray, knocked into a bowl precariously perched on the teapot. The bowl skidded off, sending two pint glasses and the lid from the butter dish flying. All of a sudden, I've got a washing up bowl full of glass.

Having got that cleaned up, I went to finish off what was left of the washing; picked up the butter dish, and promptly split my little finger open on a chipped edge. Fancy that, attacked by a butter dish of all things.

I think I may be allergic to one of the soaps we use too... Hmm.

"Thats good things serious like this need to be fun or there not fun" - I think that was a Nigel Mangle.

Disappeared Dragon!?

Oh I feel silly again.
Every morning when I wake up, I go over to the Dragonarium, switch the heatlamp on and stroke his head to say good morning.
But he wasn't asleep on his flexi-branch this time.
I twisted my head a bit to look round the tank better, and I still couldn't see him.
Ok.
That's not right.

So I slid the door open, and popped his flexibranch on the carpet. I lifted out his hut, checked it over, and put that on the carpet too. Slowly, beginning to worry, I took out his plastic vines, checked them through, and dropped them on top of the hut. Now starting to panic (where the heck has he gone?!) I took out the herbs in quick succession, and he wasn't in ANY of them. I even pulled out the newspaper to make sure he hadn't climbed between sheets and got stuck - and I couldn't find him ANYWHERE. I stuck my head in to look round, and nothing. By this time I'm cross, and start putting things back so I can go to the housemates "Ok, not funny, give him back."

At which point I picked up the flexibranch to put it back in the front of the tank... And the little guy blinked at me. What the?! YOU weren't there before! "So?" But...??? I SWEAR, the little toerag was laughing at me. He was NOT on the branch! He's sat on it now, still chuckling away to himself.

I'm not feeding him crickets any more. They're slow, smelly (however much you feed them) and he's sticking his nose up at them now, in preference to the lobster roaches I breed. I'm watching him as I type - he's just taken a big mouthful out of his mint plant, and is now trying to do the same with his plastic vine leaves. He's given up on that, and gone back to the mint - and taken a flying leap into the middle of it. Mmmm, minty-fresh dragon! (Makes him smell good!)

The axolotls aren't at their brightest at the moment either. They've been having a great time trashing the tank again, knocking the "ice cubes" all over, trying to attack me (what sweet little beasties) and having staring competitions.

Spyyk, in the picture, couldn't be bothered to move, even when a shrimp pooped all over his head. I don't know which is worse - Spyyk for proudly wearing it, or Benny, for trying to eat it. Uck.

Today's quote: "Maybe she got trapped in a cabinet" - Vince Noir, the Mighty Boosh.

Crumbs, Catch-up!

The days have really been getting away with me. It's not so much been busy, as I've been doing stuff!

Today I spent two hours (from walking in from work at five until seven) out on the front in the sunshine with Kuleana, soaking up some sunshine and getting acquainted with some of the locals. I've made friends with a little boy called Matthew. He makes a real mangle of "Kuleana" - I couldn't work out the written version if I tried every day for the next year, but it was manglemanglemanglemangle-ANA! Bless him. His mum was amused anyway, and he was delited at being able to hold the baby lizard. He ate a mint leaf today too, I saw him! At last!

Yesterday was super-awesome-cool though, I had a good day at work, finally got my internet access (which is where I started typing this up today - please note, my views are not the views of the company and all that yada), I came home, spent an hour in the garden playing with the dragon (he's still paranoid about birds), and discovered I had some post! A good friend of mine very kindly sent me all three series of Doctor Who on DVD (Sorry TD, they don't work...), and I got a postcard from my friend in Australia, predictably with a koala bear on the front. It made me laugh. Better yet, I also got half a cookie from my housemates! Yum, I like cookies!

Quote for Yesterday: "He looked like a spider monkey." - Aaron.

Monday was a corker too, didn't do much at work, got home and discovered I had some post! My brother and sister sent me some Butter Tablet from Scotland. Yum, I like Butter Tablet! Butter Tablet does not go well with salt and vinegar crisps however. I discovered this quite by accident earlier today. I also caught the giant cricket that had been hiding under my bed and chirping loudly late at night. Kuleana enjoyed eating that monster, it put up a good fight. I don't mind crickets in their box singing quietly to each other, but get a loose one and they SHOUT to be heard. REEP-CHIRP-REET-CHIP!

Monday's quote: "mind you shopship?" - SD Sam (Your guess is as good as mine...)

Saturday, my Flexi-Branches arrived from my friend Angela (she's clearing out some old herping stock, so I grabbed two for the price of one). The dragon REALLY likes his. I wake up in the morning and switch his heat lamp on, he's flaked out along the highest point fast asleep. I come home in the evening, and he's sat at the top of the branch looking at me. I know he comes off it sometimes, his herbs have been thoroughly jumped on, and there's the little pile of dragon dung for me to get rid of. But he clearly climbs back up. Snake likes hers too, she's knocked it over twice, and I found her draped asleep on it when I left for work this morning. Like some sort of scaly tinsel. My axolotls were being weird too - I noticed Benny (the yellow one) stood in the middle of the tank looking up. I followed his line of sight, and discovered Spyyk just hangin' about.

Quote of the day: "We went to a small retirement group this morning and discovered it doesn't start till next month!" - My Nan.